September 2010

Nahihiya akong sabihin dito sa blog (sa totoo lang), pero na-announce ko na rin naman sa Facebook ko, so I might as well say it here.

For several years, I've been working on this book.

Last year, natapos ko na siya.

This year, may publishing house na bumili na sa kanya.

Next year, i-re-release na siya.

Yes, dear lovely sexy readers of mine, ang aking "Sinigang at Iba Pang Kadramahan sa Buhay" ay mapupublish na po.

Sa wakas! Wooohoooo! At oo, yan ang totoong title niya.

Na-a-arouse ako sa sarili ko ngayon kasi feeling ko ang ganda-ganda ko hahaha! Joke lang, kaya andaming nang-aaway sa akin sa team eh.

Ang target release date is middle of next year.

Sa totoo lang, di pa rin nag-si-sink in sa akin na sa wakas, mapupublish na ako. Feeling ko ang tangos ng ilong ko.

What is the book about, you ask?

It's semi-true-to-life na hinaluan ko ng kaunting eklavu. It's a love story na sing-asim ng sinigang na baboy sa makating gabi.

Sana pag lumabas siya, bumili kayo para may pampa-liposuction at nosejob na ako.

But kidding aside, I really would like to thank you readers for supporting my blog and all.

Without your inspiration and support, I never would have had the courage to go through with this.

Thank you thank you thank you. Mehel kow keyowng leheyt.

I'd give you all blowjobs if I could. Yuck, yes, even the girls.

"Wasn't Pasha your anything a few months ago?" tanong ko.

"Jealous?" Schoolboi smiled.

"Cautious," sagot ko.

"Scared?" tanong niya.

"Sobra," sagot ko.

"Me, too," sagot niya.

"Talaga?" tanong ko.

"Oo naman," sabi niya.

"Why?" tanong ko.

Huminga siya ng malalim, "I'm scared that I'll never be over him."

Huminga din ako ng malalim, "I'm scared na I'll never be over Roman as well."

Tumawa si Schoolboi, "See? Bagay talaga tayo."

Tahimik lang ako.

"You really love Roman that much?" he asked.

Tumango ako.

"Sige nga, sino mas pogi, me or him?" he asked, joking.

"Mas pogi ka," sagot ko ng walang hesitation.

"Yes!" sabi niya.

"Pero mas matimbang siya," dagdag ko.

Nagkunyari siyang nanlumo sa sinabi ko.

"What's with him anyway? Why are you so into him?" he asked.

"Ewan, ganun talaga eh. Weird nga eh, everytime I'm with him, sumasakit ang tiyan ko. Alam mo yun, pag magkikita kami, sobrang excited ako, sumasakit ang tiyan ko. Makita ko palang ang medyo may kabaduyan niyang mga damit, sumasakit ang tiyan ko. Marinig ko lang jokes niya, ayan na naman ang tiyan ko. Pwede pala na sobrang love mo yung isang tao, masakit na yung dating. Mali pala sila, ang love, hindi sa puso nararamdaman, sa tiyan pala," I explained, "He's just a friend pero yun nga, I fell for him. Sakit ko naman yata yan eh. Ganun eh. Tanga ako eh. Mahal ko talaga eh."

"So hihintayin mo siyang mahalin ka niya?" tanong ni Schoolboi.

Umiling ako, "Nope, hihintayin kong ma-over ako. Mali yung feelings ko for him eh. I never should have allowed myself to fall for him."

Uminom ako ng tubig kasi naubusan yata ako ng laway sa explanation ko.

"You okay?" tanong ni Schoolboi.

"Yup," ngiti ko.

"Eh bakit naiiyak ka?" tanong niya.

"Sumasakit na naman tiyan ko eh," biro ko.

Tumahimik siya.

"Sorry ha, emo ako," sabi ko.

"S'okay," sabi niya, "I feel the same exact way with Pasha. That's why I was thinking maybe we could help each other out. You know, parang support group."

"Wow, and here I thought deds na deds ka na sa kaseksihan ng mga bilbil ko," biro ko.

Tumawa siya.

"Honestly, I like you, Schoolboi, pero we both know na what we have here, it's just two less lonely people in the world ang drama," sabi ko.

He nodded, "Misery loves company."

Bumuntung-hininga ako, "Akala ko nung high school ako, pagdating ko ng ganitong edad, alam ko na kung paano i-handle ang mga ganitong eksena, pero yun pala, it just gets more complicated. Parang status lang sa Facebook."

"We're nothing but overgrown children, I guess," sabi niya.

"Mas madali ang buhay mo, you're gorgeous, you can have anyone you want," sabi ko.

"Except Pasha's commitment," sabi niya, mahina, "And apparently, kahit ikaw ayaw mo sa akin."

"Ututan kita diyan eh," sabi ko," Alam mong hindi tayo ganyan. Aaminin ko, kinikilig ako sa flowers and dinner and everything, tao lang ako. Pero aminin mo rin, both of us would rather be with someone else tonight."

He smiled sadly.

"Ihatid mo na ako pauwi," sabi ko, tumatayo from my seat, "May pasok pa ako in a few hours."

On the way to my apartment, tahimik kami pareho. Tumutugtog ang kantang "Everytime You Go Away" sa radio niya, one of my favorite songs.

Hinatid niya ako sa pinto ng apartment ko. Malamig ang hangin.

"Thank you for a most wonderfully enlightening evening," sabi ko sa kaniya.

He leaned closer to me, "I believe I owe you a kiss."

Napalunok ako, "Friends lang tayo."

Umatras siya, "If that's how you feel..."

Hinila ko siya pabalik, "Ang ibig ko sabihin, friends tayo kaya dapat ang kiss natin, walang malisya."

"Yes, sir," sabi ni Schoolboi, leaning towards me again, smiling.

Good night, folks.

Aaminin ko, si Schoolboi na siguro ang pinakapoging naka-date ko.

On the way to Bonifacio High, while in his car, I kept making kurot myself just to make sure na hindi ako nanaginip (utong ko ang kinukurot ko para may halong kiliti).

"You're very quiet," ang puna ni Schoolboi habang lumiko kami sa McKinley Road.

Tumingin ako sa kaniya, and I couldn't help but gasp a little as I noticed how good he looked tonight.

Actually, scratch that.

He did not just look good in his navy blue long-sleeved shirt.

He looked edible.

Yung tipong pagnaglalakad ka sa mall tapos ito yung naka-akbay sayo, parang feeling mo ikaw na ang pinakamagandang lukaret sa NCR.

Ganun ka-yummy.

Plus, he was wearing my favorite perfume, Kenzo L'eau Par.

Anyway, I didn't exactly know how to respond to what he said so ngumiti na lang ako.

"You don't think this is a good idea, do you?" he asked.

Umiling ako, "Hindi naman sa ganun, it's just that..."

"What?"

"It's just that I don't understand why you're doing this," ang sagot ko, "Nabighani ka ba sa kurba ng ilong ko? Alam mo ba na dito minodel ang Volkswagen?"

He smiled, "I'll tell you over dinner."

Fast-forward sa dinner.

My favorite resto, Mamou's.

As we sat down by our table, he said, "Order anything or everything."

"I'll order anything, paki-balot na lang nung everything."

Tumawa siya ng malakas, tapos, tapos, tapos, nahihiya man akong ilagay ito sa blog, pero he reached across the table and hinawakan niya ang kamay ko.

Pinawisan ako. Hinila ko palayo ang kamay ko at nagkunyaring abala ako sa pagbabasa ng menu.

"So what are you going to have?" I asked him, all nonchalant.

I looked up from my menu, and saw him smiling.

"What? May kulangot ba ako sa ilong?" tanong ko.

He shook his head, "No, but I think I better tell you why I asked you out. Why we're having this so far rather awkward dinner."

"It is awkward, isn't it? I'm sorry, it's just that... well, sige, go ahead, ano ba ang dahilan mo at out of the blue eh in-a-aura-han mo ako?" tanong ko.

His face became serious, "Don't be offended or anything but, I think you're waiting for him to love you."

Namutla ako, "Him?"

Tumango siya.

"Sinong Him? Si Jesus Christ?" sagot ko, pinipilit idaan sa biro ang kaba.

Schoolboi didn't smile, "You know who I'm talking about, si..."

"Okay okay, you don't have to say his name," ang sagot ko, "Let's call him Roman, shall we? What about him? And what are you talking about?"

Tumahimik muna siya sandali, habang nilalatag ng waiter ang mga in-order naming food na parang enough na para pakainin ang Sales department ng account ko.

Pag-alis ng waiter, sumagot siya,"Bookie, you'd have to be deaf, dumb, and blind to not realize that you're head over heels in love with Roman."

"I am NOT in love with him," sagot ko, medyo naiinis.

Tahimik lang siya, tapos ngumiti, "Sige, if you admit na in love ka sa kanya, i-ki-kiss kita."

"Mahal na mahal ko si Roman habang buhay", sagot ko agad.

Tumawa kami ng malakas.

"Finally, inamin mo rin," sabi niya.

"Finally, malalaman ko na rin kung totoo ang sinabi ni Pasha na you are the best kisser in Manila raw," biro ko.

Tumawa siya.

"But wait, what do my feelings for Roman have to do with you? Why this date?" tanong ko.

He cut with a knife the steak that was lying on my plate, sabay subo sa akin, "You see, the thing is, alam nating pareho na Roman loves you, but not in the way you love him, am I right?"

Sinubuan ko naman siya ng salad, "Harsh mo ha?"

Nilunok niya ang gulay bago sumagot, "I thought we agreed a long time ago that we'd never lie to each other?"

"Fine fine. Okay sige na, my love for Roman burns with the fire of a thousand suns, samantalang ang love niya sa akin ay pang-watusi lang, what's your point? Wala naman akong inaasahan na mangyari sa amin eh. I'm not like that. Tanggap ko na friends lang kami."

Sinubuan niya ako ng garlic bread, "The thing is, you are stuck on him."

"Stuck?"

"Yes, stuck," pagpapatuloy ni Schoolboi, "You fail to see how many people around you love you."

"Dapat pala i-canonize na ako ng Vatican."

"Sira!," sabi niya, "Laging feeling mo, nag-iisa ka, alone ka, it's you against the world, but that's just not true."

"It isn't?"

"It's not," sabi niya, "I know for a fact that you're closest friends love you very much. Plus there's Pasha and I and Rica."

Uminom ako ng tubig bago sumagot, "So, why the date? You still haven't answered that."

"I'm tired of seeing you like this," sabi niya, holding my hand again and not allowing me to let go, "I guess, what I'm trying to say is..."

"Yes?" I leaned forward.

"What I'm trying to say is, I can be your anything, Bookie," sagot niya.

"My what?" tanong ko.

"Your anything," sabi niya, "Ikaw ang bahala."

My anything.

I drank some water, and answered...

To be continued...

Malamig ang hangin na humaplos sa balat ko habang nakatayo sa may pintuan ko. Madaling-araw kasi.

Pinagmasdan ko ang kotse ni Schoolboi habang palayo ito from my apartment.

Mag-a-alas singko na ng umaga. In about two hours, start na ng shift ko.

Wala pa akong tulog. Pero gising na gising pa ang utak ko. Feeling ko, hindi ako makakatulog ng mga dalawang linggo dahil sa nangyari.

What the hell just happened? tanong ko sa sarili ko.

Did we really just do that?

The longest night started with the shortest text.

A text message received at around 7pm:

You home? Let's have dinner. Be there in 15mins.

Si Schoolboi.

Tumingin ako sa pink kong orasan sa pink kong pader. 630PM.

Dinner? With Schoolboi? It's been weeks since we last saw each other.

Ano kayang meron?

A few minutes later, just as I had finished dressing up, I heard his car honk outside.

Bago ko pa nabuksan ang pinto, kumakatok na siya.

Pagbukas ko, nagulat ako sa nakita ko.

Si Schoolboi, at isang bouquet ng mga rosas.

Napatitig ako sa mga rosas, tapos sa mukha niya, na nakangiti, tapos sa rosas uli, tapos sa mukha niya uli.

"Ano yan?" tanong ko.

"A bucket of KFC chicken," ang biro niya, "What does it look like?"

"It looks like a bouquet of roses," sagot ko, nalilito, "Who are they for?"

Napatawa siya, "Sa iyo, syempre."

Para sa akin? Kinailangan kong pigilan ang sarili ko na akyatin ang matangkad niyang katawan at paulanan siya ng halik.

Now, dear readers, aaminin ko sa inyo, gusto ko na sanang tumakbo sa pinakamalapit na simbahan para lumuhod sa harap ni Jesus at magpasalamat sa surprise blessing niya sa akin habang kumakanta ng "Pangarap ko ang Ibigin Ka" ni Regine, pero, ang totoo, I was also very very suspicious.

I took a second to take a look at the mirror next to my door to see kung humaba na ba ang hair ko. Wala. Kalbo pa rin.

"Why in the world are you giving me flowers?" tanong ko sa kaniya, nakapamewang, "At roses pa talaga ha?"

Napakamot siya sa ulo, tapos halos hindi ko marinig ang sagot niya dahil bumubulong siya.

"Ano yun uli?" tanong ko sa kaniya, leaning towards him (and saka ko naamoy ang mabango niyang pabango).

He coughed, looking at me a little shyly, "Ang sabi ko, I always give whomever I date a bouquet of flowers."

Dear readers, mabait talaga si Papa Jesus.

To be continued...

Another Monday night spent mostly at Coffeebean in Convergys.

I swear, this place gives me more and more reason to love it.

Last night, I was drinking my favorite Pink Guava juice with Bench and my NFF, Lovely.

Tawa lang kami ng tawa about workstuff and other shit, when Bench noticed one of the shop's baristas passing by.

"Hindi ba si Pet yun?" tanong niya.

I glanced at the barista and noticed that he did look familiar.

"Yung boyfriend ni Balbasaur?" tanong ko naman; Balbasaur is this pretty and petite teammate of mine.

"Yup," sagot ni Bench.

I was introduced to Pet before pero I didn't get a good look at him. Pero ka-close ko si Balbasaur kaya nag-decide akong batiin siya.

Plus, lagi akong binibigyan ni Balbasaur sa office ng iba't-ibang cheesecakes, and my favorite Lemon Squares, galing daw kay Pet.

So paglabas ni Pet ng bathroom, nung mapalapit siya sa table ko, tinawag ko ang name niya.

"Pet!"

Napatingin siya sa akin, akala ko di niya ako maalala. Pero gaya nga ng laging sinasabi ng mga barkada ko, unforgettable daw ang nose ko.

"Sir Bookie!" kinamayan niya ako.

Pinakilala ko siya sa mga kasama ko, tapos tinanong niya ako, "Gusto niyong cakes? Lemon squares ang gusto mo di ba?"

Touched naman ako kasi naalala niya, pero siyempre may hiya pa rin namang natitira sa mga bilbil ko kaya agad akong sumagot ng, "Hindi, okay lang! No thanks."

After a few minutes, lumapit sa table namin ang guard na may dalang one Molten Lava Cake, one Blueberry Cheesecake, at one super sarap na Lemon Square.

Super namula ako sa hiya, kasi di ko talaga inaasahan na bibigyan niya ako ng cake, or ng ganun karami na cake.

Per siyempre naman, dear readers, tinanggap ko pa rin. Mahiyain ako, pero I do love cake, hehehe.

Inalok pa niya kami ng drinks pero sabi ko tama na, kahit yung mga kasama ko parang gusto pa yata humingi ng salad.

Pagkalayo ni Pet, niloloko pa ako ng mga kasama ko.

"Ang haba ng hair mo, gurl!"

"Humingi ka ng rice meal!"

"Gaga! Coffeeshop to, walang rice meal dito."

A few minutes later, may mga dumating na taga-PS din.

One of them a friend of mine, one whom I don't know, and the other one... well, let's call him Enchong.

"Ohmygod, Bench, andyan si Enchong, wag kang tumingin baka mahalata niya tayo!" bulong ko na medyo high-pitched ang boses ko.

Siya yung nasa right. Sensya na kayo sa zoom quality ng phone ng friend ko ha, 3210 lang kasi eh.

Taga-third floor siya ng building natin. And he looks like Enchong Dee.

Only cuter. Plus, I saw the email containing his credentials, super-smart ang lolo niyo. Cute AND smart. Haaay.

Kinabahan pa nga ako kasi baka ipakilala ako nung friend ko sa kaniya, kasi about thirty minutes before they came in sa shop, I was chatting with him telling him how big of a crush I had on Enchong.

Tapos lo and behold ito sila pareho sa harap ko.

If I have readers sa third floor, please tell Enchong na mahal ko na siya. And that if he and I were Facebook friends, he would have surely landed on my top ten list.

Number one na siya sa puso ko.