She-ra and I were spending our break sa pantry natin when this bald gay agent, who before that moment never even bothered to look at me, approached our table and took a seat.
"Hello," said Discreet Bald Guy, sitting across from us, smiling.
Nagkatinginan kami ni She-ra. I guess both of us were mentally asking the other if we knew this agent.
Discreet Bald Guy laughed gently and said, "Neither of you know me personally, but of course, I know you both."
She-ra scoffed, "Does this have anything to do with Callboi's blog?"
Discreet Bald Guy smiled even wider, "Yes, actually, I have an invitation to extend to both of you."
Tumaas ang kilay namin ni She-ra ng sabay. I asked, "An invitation? Debut mo?"
"Hahahaha! No, I'm organizing an orgy this Saturday morning, and I was hoping that the both of you could attend it," he casually mentioned.
Napabuka na lang ang bibig ko. Si She-ra naman, parang inimbitahan magswimming sa Galera.
"Saan? What time? Pwede magsama ng iba?" She-ra asked.
I shook off his questions, "Wait, wait, wait, anong orgy pinagsasabi mo? Itong katawan kong ito, isasama mo sa orgy? Baka ako lang ang kasya sa kama mag-isa, marse!"
"Ay sorry, mali pagkakaintindi mo, Callboi," ang sabi ng Discreet Bald Guy, "I'm inviting you as an observer, and hopefully, as a blogger."
Huh? Lalo akong naguluhan.
"As a blogger?"
"Yes, my um... makeshift company is wondering if you could possibly blog about the event. It's sort of like free advertising, you see," explained the Discreet Bald Guy.
"It's a LOT like free advertising," She-ra stated.
"Let me get this straight, you have an actual company which organizes orgies?" I asked, sounding totally incredulous.
"Yes, there are six of us," he explained, "Two of us are agents here. The other one is in a different account." Underneath our floor, to be exact.
"I think I've heard of you guys," She-ra noted, "Were you the ones who organized the last orgy in Shang, the one sponsored by Frenzy?"
Discreet Bald Guy shook his head, "Nope, that was a rival group. We organized the orgy in New World in Greenbelt about three days ago."
"Sheeeet, I didn't know they had one there," She-ra said, sounding disappointed.
"Bakit? Updated ka ba lagi sa mga ganitong events???" I asked him, sounding shocked.
"Syempre naman," he replied.
"Yuckers ka," I answered.
Discreet Bald Guy interrupted, "Well, anyway, we would appreciate it if you could, ummm..., make an appearance."
Parang artista lang. Cameo role, ba?
He continued, "There's lots of free food."
Sheeeet. The magic words. FREE. FOOD. Nanghihina ako...
But wait, wait, wait. Orgy? Ako? Now, admittedly, this wouldn't be the first orgy I've seen. SEEN, okay? SEEN, not participated in. Just to make it clear, may napanood akong isang orgy dati dahil napadaan lang ako sa apartment ng friend ko. I was a casual observer, albeit a blushing one. I would never ever EVER deign to join one. Mahihiya lang ako sa katawan ko. Tsaka, kaya ako nanuod noon, kasi suuupeeer curious lang ang lolo niyo. Pero after ten minutes, umeskapo na ako kasi, wooow pare, ang weird talaga. Para akong pumasok sa factory ng Pure Foods Hotdogs.
I remembered how awkward it was. So I turned to Discreet Bald Guy and in a serious but friendly tone said, "Sorry ha? Pero it's just not for me."
Discreet Bald Guy nodded, not looking offended or anything, smiling, in fact, and then turned to She-ra, "Eh ikaw?"
Bumunot si She-ra ng calling card, "Here's my number. Andyan din landline ko."
Panalo talaga tong si She-ra.
P.S.
As I was writing this entry, saka lang ako napa-isip ng mga ibang tanong. Orgy sa umaga ng Sabado? Bakit sa umaga? Hindi ba mas maganda kung gabi? Or baka may shift sila sa gabi? Maybe they put into consideration the number of call center agents na gustong sumali pero may pasok pag-weekends. Tapos, bakit ako inimbitahan ni Discreet Bald Guy? Mukha ba akong klase ng tao na pumupunta sa mga events na ganito? I mean, no offense, of course, to those people who do regularly attend and appreciate orgies, but it's just so, so, so not me.
