Aug 2007

My bestfriend, Potcholo, is single.

According to him, he often feels that life is incomplete as he is without a boyfriend.

I point out to him that he has lots of friends. He just replies, "Eeeeeeeeeh."

Potcholo says it's a mystery as to why he is single.

He has often enumerated to me a few of his many positive characteristics:

1) He says he isn't bad-looking (you be the judge). I don't think he's bad-looking. He kinda looks feline with his arched eyebrows and his cat-who-ate-the-canary smile.

2) He says he's funny. And I admit, I do have tons of laughs with him. Usually, when we're in the mall, he holds my hand and we pretend that we're lovers out for a stroll. People usually gawk at us, a tall fat guy holding hands with a buff moreno guy. Or when we're shopping for groceries, he links arms with me and we pretend to be a "normal" straight couple buying expensive food for a fabulous dinner party. He, of course, plays the white picket fence-wife.

3) He's a good dancer. And he is, in a strip-club kinda way. Para siyang pole dancer kung sumayaw paminsan. And when we dance, he changes his name to Patricia and we have a mock conversation pretending to be strangers in a bar.

4) He's a good cook. I love his pasta. It's really quite famous. I once made pasta for him. When he tasted it, his only comment was "Eh."

5) He is religious. In fact, he is so religious, he often cries in church. Really! It's true.

I keep telling Potcholo to be patient. That there's someone out there that's right for him.

"Antagal naman, beks! Gusto ko na magka-boyfriend!" blurts Potcholo.

"Eh di ikaw naman manligaw!" I advise him.

"Haller!! What kind of a girl do you think I am?" Potcholo shrieks.

Haaay naku...

Personally, I have nothing against the English language. I love speaking it, as a matter of fact.

However, when your company forces you to speak it continuously, it can get veeeery annoying.

You see, there's this old-new policy in our account right now which requires everyone to speak english. Below are the mechanics of the said program. The fact that the thing has mechanics makes me laugh, para siyang isang portion sa Wowowee.

Mechanics:

1. Supervisors and agents will be given an EOP card that will serve as a tracker. Each tracker will have 10 signature slots. One violation will merit a signature.

2. Signatories include Team Managers, Supervisors, Trainers, CSAT Coaches (REM), QA Analysts, CSAs and OPEX.

3. Agents can report EOP violations to any of the above signatories.

4. On the 10th violation, the violator will be asked to wear the EOP Monkey sign for the whole shift within PS premises (including all floors in PSC).

5. A new EOP card will be given to the violator who:

a. was able to acquire 10 signatures

b. was able to end the week with less than 10 signatures

6. RECOGNITION will be given to those who ended the week with NO DEMERITS.

I just got the card yesterday. It's so small I feared I might accidentally swallow it. Why I would put it in my mouth, I don't know. I'm just weird, I guess.

I find this EOP thing as being utterly silly and infuriating at the same time. And then I asked myself, would this really improve how call center agents speak english?

I do admit, there are some agents on the floor whose english is quite horrible. How they got in through HR is a mystery to me.

I once heard this agent say, "You can redempt your tickets at the redemption center."

Then there's this other agent who said, "If you are going to change your flight then you are going to change your flight."

Kakalokah.

But speaking english all the time doesn't necessarily mean that it would improve their chances of not sounding like a native of the mountains.

Implementing EOP on the floor has forced agents to whisper in tagalog whenever their asking their supervisors a question.

Plus, andaming ipokrito sa floor ha! I hear TM's and sups speaking tagalog on the floor all the time, some even using profanity.

I asked several agents and sups what they thought about this whole EOP thing and this is what they had to say:

"EOP? What EOP?"

- Blake a.ka. Mestizang Tyra

"It's nakakainis. Like, as in, kasi, you know, nakakainis eh."

- Baliw na agent

"EOP makes my english gud ol da time!"

- Erep Excellence Awardee

"Pagsasampalin ko silang lahat eh! Pag ako may nahuli na TM na nagtagalog, nakuuuuu..."

- Irate Email Agent

"I don't want to do it, but I have to because it's their policy."

- Melluna Lovegood

Save the best for last...

"Ok naman yang EOP na yan, kaso... di ba August ngayon? Dapat Filipinism tayo. Linggo ng Wika and stuff di ba?"

- Ms. Musical

Stupid for even talking to you.
Stupid for being concerned.
Stupid for believing you.
with a trust that wasn't earned.
Stupid for not learning my lesson.
Stupid for always defending you.
Stupid for ignoring the friction,
from a friend that wasn't always true.

But you know what?

Sometimes... I'd rather be stupid.

So I'll let Ate Pink just say my words...

just remember that this was not a story of two people falling in love, it was just me. Stupid old me...

From her song, "Who Knew"...

You took my hand
You showed me how
You promised me you'd be around
Uh huh
That's right
I took your words
And I believed
In everything
You said to me
Yeah huh
That's right

If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them up
Cause they're all wrong
I know better
Cause you said forever
And ever
Who knew

Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
Oh no
No no
I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you friend
I'd give anything

When someone said count your blessings now
For they're long gone
I guess I just didn't know how
I was all wrong
They knew better
Still you said forever
And ever
Who knew

Yeah yeah
I'll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again
Until we
Until we meet again
And I won't forget you my friend
What happened

If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong and
That last kiss
I'll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes
It harder
I wish I could remember
But I keep
Your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darling
Who knew
My darling
My darling
Who knew
My darling
I miss you
My darling
Who knew
Who knew

Haaay. And that's the end of the story. Over na ako. Pero I sure do miss him.

My mom told me that she's been hearing rumors that I have been hanging out and spending time with, in her own words, "bagets".

I was nonplussed at what she said. What the hell was she talking about?

The only people I hang out with are my officemates... ooooh, now I get it.

My officemates are bagets!!!

Well, maybe not by age, but certainly by looks.

I mean, look at this pic below...

I look like Carl's older brother!!!

Though, I do notice that the lighting here is quite good. Hindi masyadong halata ang pores ko. Pero malaki pa rin nose ko. Hmp.

The picture above was taken in Maria Makiling.

Don't I look like their college professor? Or a sweaty old pedophile?

Haaay.

See the girl above? No, not me, silly. The girl wearing red. Si Gian. Para kaming mag-ama no?

Now I have to confess that I like the pic above. The reason being that I am able to hide a portion of my face, thus, improving my features.

The three guys above are the guys I hang out with the most. Whenever we're at the mall, they get glances from girls, boys, gay guys, heck, even lesbians.

Most of the times I feel invisible next to them. Which, of course, is not their fault.

I was just born this way. Insecure... hehehe...