A friend of mine sent this email of mataray lines a long time ago. Ngayon ko lang uli nabasa. I loved it then, still love it now. Sarap gamitin ng mga linyang to sa mga kasama mo paminsan.:
1. On the first day of the Mango sale, the sister of my friend was looking around and picked up a dress when a woman at the counter started screaming,"Put that down, that ' s mine!" The sister of my friend looked up, looked at the woman up and down, raised an eyebrow, and replied, "Excuse me. You are NOT small! ' "
2. A supervisor once told a worker who has difficulty in understanding instructions, "Ang ulo, hindi lang yan pinapatong sa leeg, ginagamit din yan sa pagiisip."
3. A friend told another friend, "Naku, magma-make-up muna ako, baka magmukha akong yaya mo." The other friend replied, "Wag na, magmumukha ka lang yaya ko na naka-make-up."
4. "Ako, I was born beautiful. Ikaw, you were just born."
5. When I saw friend I haven ' t seen in a long time, she told me, "Grabe, lalo ka pang tumaba!" So I told
her, "Ikaw din, lalo ka pang pumangit!"
6. Pag sinisingitan ako sa pila, nagpaparinig ako. I say, "Ang pilang ito, according to beauty. Mga panget
7. "Maliban sa mukha mo, ano pang problema mo?"
8. I once told an officemate who kept on bragging about her new shoes, "Sale, right?"
9. I pointed a "7 items or less" sign to a clueless pasosyal at the supermarket. She bitchily answered,
"I can read!" Sabay irap. So I shot back with, "I know, but can you count?"
10. "Tuwing nakikita kita, gusto ko mag-sorry sa eyes ko."
11. After receiving her pay slip and realizing how much she's paying for tax, a sosyal officemate exclaimed, "Ang mga poor ba nagbabayad din ng tax?"
12. During a hike at Mt. Mayon , we had a maarte companion. When we ran out of water, our guide got us some from a natural spring. The maarte girl said, "Dini-drink ba yan?" I told her, "Bakit, sa inyo ba ang water chinu-chew?"
13. Bading: (envying a girl na crush ng crush niya) "Isang butas lang ang lamang mo sa ' kin!"
14. I was staring at an ugly bystander on their street. The ugly guy snapped, "Bakit ang sama mo makatingin?" I snapped back, "Eh bakit ang sama mo tignan?"
15. A friend once told me, "Ang ganda mo!" I answered: "Thank you, sana ikaw rin."
16. "When a cashier tells me she doesn ' t have change, I say: "And kaninong problema yun?"